Bad Weather
First published in the print column, Strictly Haresay
As I write this, a large swath of the Midwest is bracing for a major winter storm to hit, midweek—the same time this column comes out in most of the papers in which it runs. Blizzard is the word I’m seeing and hearing as I scan various sources for weather updates.
Vexing as they are, blizzards aren’t anything new to folks in these parts. These country people of the High Plains take the news of impending weather of the life-threatening variety with a stoic good grace that, to an outsider, might be mistaken for indifference.
But if you’re from here, you know better. Hats get pulled down a little tighter, zippers are brought all the way up, and everyone gets on with the business of life in this unforgiving land with a heavier step and a lowered gaze.
You might hear comments like, “Looks like we’re in for a good one,” or, “Got yer hatches all battened down, Fred?” Mind you, this is no idle banter. What’s really happening in these exchanges is people reminding each other this ain’t their first rodeo, and offering the grim reassurance they don’t expect it be the last. For reassurance of something predictable can still be a comfort, even when it’s grim. But you’d have to be from around here to understand that.
Live here long enough, and you just know not to get overly excited about things like the weather—not that “overly excited” is a behavior that’s easily identifiable. Excitement has many forms—and outcomes—out here.
Like the rancher who was driving his pregnant wife to the hospital, and when it became apparent they weren’t going to make it in time, he pulled over and, being the practical sort, grabbed the calf pulling chains from where they dangled by the rearview mirror. The woman later recounted the event, saying her husband got “overly excited” in assisting her with the delivery. The rancher, himself, thought his wife was the one getting “overly excited” when she proceeded to kick out his two front teeth.
Then there was the guy who went ice fishing and fell through the ice and drown. At the funeral, relatives joked he met his demise because got overly excited to catch a fish.
Out here, you learn early: there’s no good comes from getting too excited about anything.
That’s why when the weather forecast predicts things like forty-below wind chill and white out conditions, you won’t hear anyone say anything that might be construed as alarming. People not from here scratch their heads and wonder why the locals aren’t taking this weather situation serious when all people are saying is things like: “Ready for a little snow?” and, “Got enough toilet paper for a day or two?”
But if you’re from around here, you know exactly what that means.
